It’s early morning and I sit in deep contemplation. My thoughts are scattered but I feel a longing for expression of a different kind. The sun has yet to break the horizon yet there is a magnificent dawning in my spirit… it gets brighter and my soul awakens to this prayer and realization of that I am truly loved…
To you, all the praise and glory belong and I give it freely.
You are my heart, Father.
I realize this fully now.
You listen and honor me to the fullest. Even with the things I cannot verbalize or that make no sense You comprehend fully. When my heart is heavy and wounded, You offer the greatest healing possible: Your presence.
To be surrounded by your essence…. I’m lost to describe it!
You are the love of my life…
After all these years of searching for the love, understanding and compassion I so desperately needed, I found that You were right here the entire time…
Not that I ever turned away from you; I had a “secret” place in my heart reserved for the “special love of my life”.
Well, in my defense, I was conditioned to believe that my true love would be found in a man…
He would come gallantly into my life and sweep me off my feet, carry me into a Disney world of magic surrounded in pixie dust where we would frolic through fantastic scenes of wonder and joys galore. Then, after the play was over and the pixie dust had settled, he would set me back upon my feet and place the world before me…
But, alas, I found the opposite…. the ugliness of this world’s tainted love.
It is interesting that I sit here with a smile upon my face as a slide show replays in my head the harsh events of my past. Yes, a smile indeed because each experience led me closer to what I needed the most:
YOU!
Each trial and every form of tribulation ushered me into this place where I now abide in peace, comfort, and joy:
It is written that in your presence there is fullness of joy and at your right-hand pleasures evermore…
It is my testimony that this is true. Yet, there is something else:
TRUE LOVE!
Thank you, Father
Amen
